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Paris is angry with Rory. Well, furious is more like it. And twirling tornado of rage describes it exactly.

This shouldn't really astound Madeline; she should see it as some full-circle fulfillment of the rivalry that colored the early part of their relationship. But she can't help but find it surprising.

She can't see how anyone could be angry with Rory. Even Dean -- dumped-on, lonely Dean -- wants to be her friend again. She's one of those girls who manages to entrance others without even trying.

Madeline should know -- Rory's done it to her. And continues to do it on an uninterrupted loop without even noticing what she's doing.

She's in love, and she's not sure what she finds most alarming: being in love with a girl, being in love with someone who doesn't love her, or being in love with someone she can no longer go within twenty feet of.

* * * * *

She watches Rory sit alone in the cafeteria, eating lunch with headphones on and a book in front of her. It's a sight that she never liked even before her feelings for Rory deepened, a sight that she'd grown accustomed to not seeing, a sight that depresses her. She's tried floating the idea of making up with Rory, but Paris silenced her with a stare. Maybe one last time, though, wouldn't hurt.

"Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea... " Madeline begins. Paris responds with a face of stone. Okay, so maybe one last time would hurt. "... to mix skim milk with whole milk." Somehow, this satisfies Paris.

Doesn't work so well on Louise, though. "What are you talking about?"

"I was going to say something about... R-O-R-Y, but I decided against it," Madeline clarifies in a whisper.

"Oh," Louise nods.

Paris sighs heavily. "I can spell, you know. This... I'm not hungry," she proclaims before leaving in a huff.

"I thought I was speaking quietly," Madeline mutters. "Was I speaking quietly?"

"You did fine, hon," Louise says. "Paris just has otherworldly senses."

Louise pats her arm tenderly, and Madeline remembers the time when she thought she was in love with her. And if she were still, it could be so much simpler. Granted, it would still be complicated, but less so. But then she looks at Rory, and the weight of her current unrequited need hits her like a ton of bricks. "Yeah, I guess."

"You okay?"

Madeline shrugs. "Fine." She averts her gaze from the lone girl, looks directly into Louise's eyes. "Perfectly, wonderfully fine," she continues, punctuating her comments with a smile. "Just a little distracted."

"Understandable. It's like we have our own little drama playing out in front of our eyes."

"Yeah." She sighs. "Do you think they'll ever make up?"

"Hard to say. Paris is pissed, but she's forgiven people before."

Madeline lets her eyes travel back to Rory, hopes Paris does deign to forgive her -- and soon.

She can pretend to share Paris's hatred for only so long.

* * * * *

She's making out with this guy, trying to remember how she ended up with him. Is he a friend of Louise's date? Or did she pick him at random?

What's his name?

He breaks away from her, pleased smirk on his face. "How'd you like that?"

"Great... " Jeff? Jon? Jack? "... you guy. I'm having a really good time." He leans in again, presses his lips against hers. As his tongue slides into her mouth, she wonders about Rory. Would she kiss this forcefully? Would her hands roam as randomly?

Can she go a minute without thinking about Rory?

The last question's answered as her mind continues to wander, spinning a series of Rory-related thoughts. Rory and her, hanging out. Rory and her, on a date. Rory and her, after a date. Rory and her, kissing. Rory and her, falling deeper with every moment.

"Stop," she says as she pushes her date away. "Stop."

"What?" he says, face etched with shock and hurt. "I thought you were having a good time."

Madeline nods. "I was... am... " She searches for the right words -- but there's no easy way to say 'I feel like I'm cheating on someone I'll never date.' "... I think I'm coming down with a cold. I need to go home."

He shrugs, sighs. "Fine."

* * * * *

"You broke up with Todd?" Louise asks.

"That was his name?" Madeline replies.

"Yes." Pause. "Wait. You didn't know his name? Okay, maybe it's fine that you broke up with him. Still, I thought we were going to try to stick to the same guys."

"Well actually, I was thinking that I should give up boys for a while," Madeline says.

Louise blanches. "Please tell me you're not serious. I can't go out on a date with just my date." Pause. "Wait. That sounded weird." She shakes her head. "Anyway. What brought this on?"

Madeline shrugs. "Nothing, really. I just need to focus."

"You can tell me the truth, you know."

She hesitates for a moment, tries to calculate the amount of horror that Louise would register at the news of her sexuality. The possibility looms that she would be frightened beyond belief -- and, as much as Madeline doesn't want to think it feasible, she still knows it could happen. "I am telling you the truth."

Louise nods. "Okay. You take your break. But I'll just have to work twice as hard to keep everything equal." Pause. "Wait. That didn't sound right."

* * * * *

Paris is still angry with Rory.

Rory is still sitting alone.

And Madeline still can't keep from watching her. She's sure her skin must be turning from pale to pink, but nobody comments. Just as nobody dares reference Rory.

"Did you know that Madeline's given up boys?" Louise asks.

Paris nods. "Yes, actually. She's already given me the 'trying to focus' speech."

Louise looks over to Madeline. "There was a speech?"

"Maybe it just seemed like one," Paris interjects, tone harsh.

"Look, it's not our fault that... " Louise stops as the Paris glare returns. "... things happen that are things that might not be good." Again, Paris leaves in a huff. Again, one friend looks to another for support. "I didn't say anything wrong, did I?"

Madeline shakes her head. "You did fine." And, again, one girl's eyes return to the form of someone she can't have.

She knows for certain that she can't fake hatred any longer.

* * * * *

She's heard of people's hearts skipping beats when the person they love walks into the room. For Madeline, it's more of a hop. A happy, fruitless hop. Granted, the girls' room is the opposite of romance, but she can't help but smile as she glances at Rory's reflection in the bathroom mirror.

She's not sure what to say -- partly because of her own feelings, partly because of the Paris complications. "Hey," she drops lightly.

Rory seems skittish. "Hey," she utters, starting to wash her hands.

"Have you talked to Paris?" Madeline asks.

"I've yelled at Paris and been yelled at. I wouldn't exactly call that talking."

Madeline hesitates. "I can't really talk to you because of Paris and everything... but I want you to know, I still want to be your friend. And, Paris will get over this. I really think she will."

Rory's lips curl into a tiny smile. "Thanks for not screaming at me. It's a refreshing change."

"No problem." In another second, Rory's gone, and Madeline's heart is still bouncing around in her chest.

One day soon, she'll be Rory's friend again.

That'll have to be enough.

THE END